Trying to stay afloat in shallow water.

In two days, I will be 22.

I feel old and insignificant, but at the same time I feel wiser. Better.

A lot has happened this year, the good and the bad. The Yin and the yang. But I can safely say that, yet again, I've endured a lot. And in the process, I have learned. For me, life is all about learning. And while I am still learning, I can honestly say that I will feel alive.

Belief-wise, I have discovered things that are facts, rather than fiction. Yes, I have been converted to agnosticism. I've been living in a facade of lie and literatures for 21 years and now I've been reborn to see life in a clearer perspective, not in a kaleidescope metaphors and stories not even physically or logically possible. Coming back to traditional faith would be possible if I wanted to, but for now, I'd be here. Learning. And I would, too, if there are reasons, of course.

Professionally, I believe I grew. Of course, in time, you will grow. I can say that I am on my way to success. But I know it is still early to assume that. But at least, I have started. I am now working for two years and I can say that work is my number one priority right now.

Emotionally, I stay firm. No words can harm me now. The chinks on my emotional armor are long gone. Of course, there are times that you will be down and sad, but that's life. You take it as it comes and just rejoice that you've been given a chance to fight.

Life is now turning for the better for me and I can't complain. I firmly believe that you should live for the now, not for the future. Be glad of what you have now and no crying over wasted milk.

So world, kiss my friggin' ass!