Look at the damage we have done now to each other.
Life, repa, has its ways of mocking you but in the process, it molds you to a better you. I've posted variations of that previous sentence a million times in this blog. Well, last year has been catastrophic for me, especially the last quarter. It's like being in a war, and you're in the front line... or something like that. Anyways, I've learned to cope. To adopt myself to the ever-changing world. The world of uncertainties and unpredictability. The tides of change tried to knock me off my feet, but I endured. Well, I can't say that I am perfectly happy with where I am right now, but at least, I am not asking for more.
You see, I am the type of person who is always contented with what I have. If opportunity looms over the horizon, I just wait and see. Poised like an eagle, to grab his prey. Hahaha, lousy analogies. Anyways, I am the type of person who crosses the bridge when I get there. Life has thought me to be persistent. Yeah, I am persistent to the point of stupidity. Well, if you ask me, my persistence is turning to stubborness. But now, I am learning to know when to give up.
Repa, repa... Now I have managed to control emotions. To shut them, if you will. Ah, being heartbroken and paranoid can be fatal at times, but I did not let that interfere with my work. I am just starting on the corporate world and I am at the rock bottom. Of course, I need to learn from my past mistakes and utilize everything I learned and be a corporate tiger. Hahaha, you see, I like animal analogies. Anyways, the bottom line is, if you let the chinks in your emotional armor show up, then you're dead. That's it.
Well, as for my title, wala lang, I've just realized that friendships you thought were forever can crumble down with just a few words. Yeah, words that will pierce through your ribs, lungs, heart, and other internal organs. Haha... You learn to grow apart. You learn to live a day without ending it with a smile because you know someone is thinking of you. You learn to adopt yourself to the changes. You learn to cope with problems alone. You live as you learn, every painful inch of your life. You've tried to control the damage, but in the end, the damage is still there. Scars remain. The pain subsides, but the scars remain. Gray and itchy. If you remedy the itch by scratching it, you remember the pain and it reminds you how painful it was. Ah, lost friendships. But at least, you were thankful that the friendship was fun while it lasted. You try to forget, but you can't deny that it will stay with you always and forever.
You've cried so many times. Now you deserve to be alive. To be new again. Well, all I can say is thank you.
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BTW, we will be having some overnight thing tomorrow, friday. We were asked to bring a friend. So, I asked my friend and she accepted. So, all is set. It's been a while since I've pooled around, get it, pooled around. Hahaha... corny.
Ui, nagmail na si pareng cruisecontrol, tapos na si build, geh, got to go!
Life is like juggling, miss one ball, and everything tumbles.
Labels: Scarred thoughts
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